We’ve reported to camp in the best shape of our lives, following a normal offseason, with the goal of just showing what we can do. We just never felt right last year, and we know we’re going to get to the back of our baseball card this season.
Spring training is warmer weather, sunnier dispositions and a cavalcade of cliches — from managers, from executives, from players and yes, even from us writers. What they say in Surprise seldom does.
So, we’ve solicited candidates from across our MLB staff for the best cliches deployed each spring. Tim Britton has evaluated each, narrowed down the list and ranked them. Unlike most competitions in spring, the outcome of this one wasn’t predetermined.
13. “I don’t want to leave anybody out.”
When a manager tries to soft-shoe a question about competition for a roster spot. The truth might be that there are two or three players in camp vying for the last place in the bullpen or on the bench. But managing egos and personalities is part of the job along with writing lineups and making pitching changes. So get ready for this stock response to be followed by a lengthy recitation of names, including several of whom have no chance short of a meteor strike of making the team. And two questions later, the manager is likely to circle back and name a couple more guys, too. — Andrew Baggarly
RANKING: There are so many players in spring training, that even the managers who make sure they don’t want to leave anybody out always leave somebody out.
Managers like Craig Counsell, left, can often get caught up in trying to include everyone in camp. (Matt Dirksen / Chicago Cubs / Getty Images)
12. “My expectations for myself are higher than anybody else’s.”
Typically a response to a question about pressure — in a new city, with a new contract, off a down season — players talk, justifiably, about the high standards they set for themselves. They wouldn’t be in a major-league camp otherwise, of course. But on the other hand, have you encountered social media? Have you been to a sporting event and sat in the stands with a frustrated fan? Players might think baseball is a game of failure, but not every fan, fantasy player or prop bettor agrees. You can win the World Series and there’s always going to be a George Costanza out there scoffing, “Yeah, in six games.” — Tim Britton
RANKING: In my experience, is this cliche usually wielded by a player who bristles at criticism earlier than his peers? I’ll never say. But this ranks this low because, for the most part, it’s true: Players do have remarkable standards for themselves, and spring training is one of the easiest times of the year to see that work in action.
11. “We don’t pay attention to projections.”
You hear variations of this from front-office executives across the game, especially those with teams expected to be mediocre, maybe teams that are one big move away from being contenders. Execs don’t worry about outside noise. They trust the guys in that clubhouse. They certainly don’t care about projections … never mind the fact modern front offices have legions of staffers devoted to finely tuned models and internal projections. Most are well aware of what FanGraphs and PECOTA think. Most of their internal models probably aren’t far off. — Cody Stavenhagen
RANKING: The only team that actually gets to say this with a straight face is the Rockies.
10. “I cut out [X] this season.”
This line could come from an out-of-shape ballplayer who arrives looking trimmer. It could come from a young player maturing and taking their career more seriously. Back at the tail end of the steroid era, when the league began to crack down on drug testing, you might hear it from anyone who arrived suddenly looking a little leaner. Players will talk about the guilty pleasures they eliminated from their diets. This usually means ice cream, candy or their favorite fast-food restaurant. The humanizing comments are always met with a chuckle from a gaggle of reporters and a goofy smile from the player. Sometimes major leaguers eat just like you! — Stavenhagen
RANKING: I love the range of sacrifice you see in what I like to call “crazy diet stories.” Some players give up all carbohydrates and other guys go into detail about how they finally eliminated the pack of Sour Patch Kids from their nightly routine.
9. “I think we can surprise some people.”
A popular phrase used by coaches, players and executives alike in attempts to talk up their roster. Never mind the fact that this sentiment is basically a self-admission that said roster does not project to be very good. We hear some form of this phrase every year from multiple organizations. You know who we don’t hear it from? Teams that are going to be good. — Katie Woo
RANKING: Just once, I want an executive from a team projected to win 100 games to say, “I think we’re going to surprise some people,” and shake their head nervously.
8. “I went to Driveline.”
Did your favorite veteran pitcher fail to meet his career standards last season? Did your team invite its best pitching prospect to his first major-league camp? Is there a journeyman non-roster invitee still trying to salvage his career and win a spot in the bullpen? Chances are, they might’ve sought help from Driveline, the renowned pitching development factory in Washington that’s worked wonders for many of the game’s most recognizable names. Visiting Driveline produces hope that either a turnaround is coming or a next level can be reached — two eternal storylines in any spring training. — Chandler Rome
RANKING: There was a brief stretch earlier this decade where this probably was the No. 1 spring cliche. Before teams became better acquainted with the technology and techniques of Driveline, basically every pitcher off a down season talked about wintering in Washington. Now, players can get similar assistance from their own staff, and using that data to adjust their repertoire — another popular cliche — is more meaningful than ever.
7. “I just hope we can all stay healthy.”
Spoiler alert: This won’t happen. Spring training is a ripe time for injuries, from the freak accidents to the nagging elbow discomfort that didn’t quite go away with a restful offseason. But, spring is the time for optimism. If you want to look at your roster on paper, squint and predict perfect health, there’s no better time to do it. This most often applies to the pitching, acknowledging one of the game’s best truths: There’s no such thing as too much pitching depth. — Fabian Ardaya
RANKING: This goes hand in hand with another cliche that just missed the rankings: “We like our depth.” Teams often like their depth more in theory than in practice, and that’s why they’re hoping everyone can stay healthy — a hope typically punctured well before the first pitch of any exhibition games.
6. “Just getting my work in.”
The stock response from a starting pitcher — usually a veteran who has a guaranteed contract and isn’t fighting for a spot on the team — after they get hammered for five runs in an exhibition game, get pulled early and have to throw the rest of their prescribed pitch count in the bullpen during the game. Variations from standoffish or less media-friendly starting pitchers tend to be something like, “You don’t know what I’m working on.” — Baggarly
RANKING: I’m going to hit “Send” on this story and, when my editor politely asks, “This is what we’re doing today?” I’ll nod and say, “Yeah, just getting my work in.”
It’s not unusual for pitchers like Justin Verlander, right, to experiment during spring training. (Andy Kuno / San Francisco Giants / Getty Images)
5. “I’ll do anything they need me to do.”
Given a respite this spring by the likes of Marcus Stroman and Rafael Devers, “I’ll do anything they need me to do,” comes from the prospect learning a new position, the veteran coming off the bench or the pitcher stuck somewhere between the rotation and the bullpen. Maybe a little too often, it’s said by someone who won’t be needed to do a whole lot during the season. — Britton
RANKING: The main variation on this is, “I’ll catch if they wanted me to,” and I wonder whether catchers like others viewing their position as the least fun to play.
4. “I’m just glad I don’t have to face him.”
This is the go-to line about any new teammate. Could be a Red Sox player talking about Garrett Crochet, a Dodger about Tanner Scott, a Yankee about Paul Goldschmidt, a Blue Jay about Max Scherzer. When reporters crowd close early in camp and ask about the new arrival, are you going to be blunt? “Just hope we don’t get second-half Crochet.” “Scott’s command is a problem.” “Goldy isn’t the same hitter these days.” “When’s the last time Scherzer threw 180 innings in a season?” No! You’ll say that the guy is nasty, you’re glad he’s on your side now, and you’re just glad you don’t have to face him anymore. (Even though you’re pretty confident you would take him deep.) — Stephen Nesbitt
RANKING: If only there were a corollary here where the player’s former teammates say, “I’m just glad I get to face him again.” Like, Luke Weaver should be crowing about holding Juan Soto to a .606 OPS in 11 career meetings and saying he can’t wait for the Subway Series.
3. “The way he goes about his business”
There’s a new star in the clubhouse. He’s wearing your uniform, playing on your team, sharing your clubhouse. You must have lots of cool observations about him, right? Actually, it’s all about “the way he goes about his business.” And needless to say, now that the new star is here, his way of business-going will permeate the entire roster. Just what “way” is that? And what kind of “business” is going down? Hey, who knows? But baseball is a business. And everyone’s just trying to make their way. — Tyler Kepner
RANKING: If you ask a prospect who was just sent back to the minors what he learned about being in big-league camp, there is a 100 percent chance he will use this phrase. Furthermore, when you ask a follow-up on the lessons to be learned from said business-going, he’ll say, “So much,” and provide virtually no detail. (The prospects who do provide details are the ones you know are going places.) The only thing holding it back: It’s not just a spring cliche. You hear it from the prospect just called up in May, too. Talking about how others go about their business is just how young prospects go about their business.
2. “It’s a wide-open competition.”
Is your team’s fifth starter spot unsettled? Do you know who is filling out your bullpen? What about the last spot on your bench? Spring training buzz can be a real and powerful thing and has gotten many a player onto a big-league roster, but for every one of those cases, there are likely 30 position battles that are largely set before camps open. Jobs can be lost more than they can be won, be it through injury or otherwise. A manager throwing this out there is technically true. There are cases where circumstances can shift. But it should usually come with a grain of salt. — Ardaya
RANKING: What’s great about this cliche is it’s really a family of them. It’s not just that every competition is wide open. It’s that every manager actually likes competition, that competition is good, that it’s going to bring the best out of each player when everything is earned. And then it’s Opening Day, and the veteran who hit .110 in the Cactus League is leading off (because his job was never really in doubt) and lacing a line-drive double to right-center off last year’s Cy Young Award winner. Because of that opposite cliche: Spring evaluations are really hard.
1. “It’s spring training for everybody.”
It’s the universal get-out-of-trouble expression, sure to elicit … well, not a laugh, but maybe a nod and a knowing shrug. The players are getting into game shape, so mistakes are understandable — and the same, naturally, must hold for the rest of us. Drop your pen while taking notes for an interview? Point the bus for Surprise instead of Scottsdale? Write two left fielders on the lineup card? Hey, no worries. It’s spring training for everybody! — Kepner
RANKING: What gave pause in deciding the top spot was this: Players don’t really say, “It’s spring training for everybody.” Coaches do, executives do, PR staffers do — and more than anyone, writers do. And so it’s the one we hear the most — far more than anything else on this page — and it’s our own fault. Isn’t that the ultimate cliche?
(Top photo of Mets’ Francisco Lindor smiling at Juan Soto: Rich Storry / Getty Images)
